Well look what we've got here and bunch of high school dropouts with a Record contract, now this seems to be a bad idea having some 16 year old kids so called MC'ing about PhatRides (cars), Bling (expensive jewelry), G's (money) and Bitches (women) over a cover version of a song there not even old enough to remember the 1st time round.
Lets face it this so called squad haven't see a day in the streets/hood/ghetto other than on there Menace to Society DVD because it look like they all went to private schools, they rap about Phatrides when the majority of them arn't even old enough to drive nevermind be able to pass the test and afford to Insure a car, they all MC about Bling when its clear there wearing a £40 watch from argos where they used to work and able to get a 15% discount, Money? theres 10 of them for fucks sake 25p between 10 peoples for each single sold would make them about £4.50 each, Women, these kids look asif they've never seen 2 base nevermind nailing all the ho's.
I'm ashamed to say that i actually downloaded there 1st song by mistake, the song I was originally after downloading was Bone Thugz N Harmony's version of Crossroads and somehow I got there shit version. After listening to it a few time it kinda grew on me and thought it was OK. When Blazin Squads version of Crossroads finally got into the Charts, Number 1 may I add, I saw the people who sing this song for the first time and it turned out to be none other than a bunch of kids with a cheesey dance routine. R&B artists and a dance routines just dont mix only big bruva's can pull that shit off, also if your gonna emcee over a Track and want a bad boy image you gotta loose the dancing or else your straight in the boyband catergy right up there with those twats like Westlife, Boy Zone and Blue. So if any of the Blazin' Squad, the Blazin' Squads mum's or there managment are reading this heres a few pointers to help Blazin' Squad sell more records and nail more teenage girlies.
Pointers:
1) Grab your crotch alot all the great artists do it
2) Drive flash cars with Hydrolic Suspension
3) Blow vast amounts of money on your Record video's
4) Get lots of tattoo's done
5) Big screen TV's , Blondes , Bitches and 40's
6) Dont say So Solid Crew inspire you
7) Loose the FUCKING dance routine you really do look homosexual
8) Start Puberty and start shaving
9) Purchase XXL Clothing atleast 10 sizes to big, like FUBU, Marc Ecko etc
10) Be old enough to even drink then splash out on Hennessy
I thought that there Number 1 smash hit Crossroads was quite good for a few days but soon has I saw these dancing freaks I just felt so dirty, cheap and used there like a bunch choir boys in Nikey's, I thought that a good name had been wasted and such a bunch of pathetic un-tallented youths where as a better name like the So Solid Juniors would have fitted there image perfectly.
The Squad Ok i've slayed the Blazin'Squad as a collective of MC's but these could be atleast genuwine people so i've done a little research using the internet and I managed to find out a little information about each member of the squad heres the best of the Squads hobbies, dreams and interests.
Tommy B aka Tommy Beasley:
He's the squads DJ and he collects CD's. Wow, like who doesn't? name one person who doesn't have a collection of CD's.
Reepa aka Stuart Baker:
Not only does he not know where his nickname came from, which means he sat in his bed room and made it up, he's also more illiterate than me and looks 13 years old.
Krazy aka Lee Bailey:
Called Krazy because he's "Crazy" I'd prefer to say "Immature" also the name Crazy was taken by a So Solid Crew member so he changed the 1st letter to a "K" how original.
Flava aka James Murray :
Flava says in his profile he's "a Hugh Eminem fan". What the fuck does that mean he own's 3 of his albums? what a true fan.
Strider aka Mus Omer:
Chose this name because he's a fast runner, Yeah right and heres me thinking he just stole it from Lord of the Rings.
Spike-E aka Sam Foulkes:
Called Spike-E because of his spikey hair . Obviously a total idiot with no creativity.
Kenzie aka James MacKenzie:
Kenzie said in his profile "that he Would like to work with Dr Dre". Doing what exactly your homework?
Melo-D aka Chris McKeckney:
He loves to play Metal Gear Solid 2, Even though he wants to be a Badass rapper he stays in playing shit video games. If you wanna see some real Fibre-Wire bitch i'll show you some from close up.
Rocky B aka Marcel Somerville:
The Token Ethnic Minority one of the group he's only in the Squad so there Record lable cant be sued for only have all white members you know how the boyband ethnic minority member works right? He chose this name because he loves the Film. Personally I dont remember the film Rocky B I remember a Rocky 1-26 but not a Rocky B.
Freek aka Ollie Georgiou:
Called freek probably by everyone who bullied him at school for his hidious facial features like supporting the mono-brow.
There we have it all 10 members and not 1 half decent thing to say between them as individuals they suck and as a Squad they suck even more.
