Who are these idiots that find wearing stupid ties amusing? Seriously I'd really like to know whats the purpose of wearing a tie with a large walt disney character on it or a pattern so blinding it could make someone have an epaleptic fit. I don't know where this hatered towards these ties came from probably because a Maths teacher at my old school used to wear them everyday and pretend to be young and hip but we all knew that he couldn't have look any more retarded. He used to think it gave off a ....

"Im a crazy, wacky and wild sort of guy ready for anything sort of vibe"

but we all know what they really spell out...

"Help me, im a 45 year old vigin who lives with his mom having a mid-life crisis and wearing this histerically funny tie will makes me look younger and more attractive to school girls."

Its time we put an end to these Middle aged Men from imbrassing themselves any further.

Crackdown of DealersHere at Phoenixlords.com are staff felt sorry for these people that fell victim to these laughable ties and thought this outrage had to be stopped A.S.A.P. We started a name and shame program to help stop these outragous tie dealers. The First thing we had to find out was, Where do these fasion victoms get these ridiculas ties from? After many tip off's that are loyal fans sent us via E-mail we knew that these Con-artists was working from inside are very own Capital City so The Phoenix Inc™ packed our bags and travelled to the heart of where these dodgy tie salesmen took place yes London. After searching round for many hours upon end we did managed to catch one of London's best ties salesmen in action from a location called Hammersmith market he went by the code name of Sanjeez and seem'd to have the biggest collection of crap ties I've ever seen and right in the middle of his collection was the the typical walt disney tie.

Ties? Come get your Ties

Using are hightech photography equipment also know as a digital camera we snapped this fiend so our viewers can beware of this master. Sanjeez can usually be found in many locations usually market places with his trusty mobile tie stall loaring in his prey with a cry of "Ties, Come get your Ties" Sanjeez's call brings people flocking to his stall in mass groups, but beware readers because as soon as you shut your eyes to blink this pro has a tie round your neck faster than you can open them. After you've been noosed with his expert charm he starts to compliment on how much younger and attractive this tie makes you look, making you feel happy and willing to hand over your cash.

But be warned these are all lies and just a big scam to help sell you a tie why do you think they never have a mirror on there stall?

Hint: Beware people when purchasing Ties always carry a mirror, have a friend with you and only buy them in daylight.

If you have just read this article and you wear one of these Funny Ties for Work/Pleasure or you was robbed by a dodgy tie salesman you could send me a picture of yourself wearing one of these stupid ties and I'll add them to the bottom of this article. E-mail